Gratitude

This Thanksgiving Kip had to work so we stayed home and didn't even host anybody. In fact, my dear friend invited us to her house and so I didn't even have to lift one tiny Thanksgiving finger. I ended up going to a free yoga class that morning and then bathing and putting on make up. Whoa. It was kind of weird. I missed Kip though (he was sleeping). And I missed my family a lot. But then Kip woke up just in time to drive with us to dinner at the Tibbs (I had thought we'd end up driving separately and it bummed me out a bit) and we had a really really nice time with them. I'm so glad they invited us.

And I wanted to write about a few random, perhaps odd things that I'm grateful for. Some of them are pretty cheesy and sentimental.

1. Mark is maturing. Several months ago a friend told me a story about how she was upset about something and her sixteen-year-old son put his arm around her and said, "It's okay, Mom, it happens to everyone." I listened to that story with a bit of wonder. Was it true that boys who are actual children could come to the point where they could express love and empathy in both physical and verbal ways. This seemed sheer impossibility to me. And even though I'm sort of making this all jokey--I mean, it really seemed impossible to me. In our family when I got upset about something the girls would come give me hugs and kisses and Mark would flee to his room or get angry at me or--at the very best of times and only recently--try for a joke. And then one day this week, I was tired and a bit harried and upset about something small, but still almost in tears by dinnertime. I was talking to Kip about it and nearly crying and my son--my very own son--came up to me, put his arm around me, and leaned his head on my shoulder. Fortunately I didn't pass out from shock and crush him. And, seriously, it was the most beautiful, wonderful thing to me. Maybe I'll change my mind with my girls, but at this point all I have to say is that the tweens are the best.

2. I am so glad that Kip and I talk and spend time together. I'm glad that at night when the kids walk into the family room after they're supposed to be in bed (arg) that they often see me and Kip talking or cuddling together. I mean, we're not perfect, don't get me wrong. But I'm glad that we often get to be together and just enjoy and discuss the small (and sometimes big) things of life.

3. I'm glad for Emma's singing. Truth be told, I'm glad for everyone's singing and especially for my kids' singing. But Emma has this super duper high singing voice and she'll make up songs and I wish I could remember everyone because then my life would always be happy every minute.

4. I love listening to my girls play. They often play as sisters. They'll be sister cats. Or sister princesses. Or sister whoevers. It's kind of sweet. Even if they do often end up bickering like sister creatures sometimes do.

5. Listening to Mark laugh. Again, I'm pretty much glad for everyone's laughter and especially for my kids', but Mark's is extra jolly.

6. I'm grateful for Savannah's thoughtfulness about life. Last month we did a lesson in Primary about gifts, particularly spiritual gifts. Since then she has often asked me what I think hers are (sharing, loving, giving, and helping in case you're wondering). Then she says, "When I grow up I think one of mine will be helping poor people. I'm going to be a baker and give food to poor people." I believe it too. She thinks deeply about things. And cares deeply about things. And is very cuddle-able.

7. I'm grateful for Elizabeth's creative and free spirit. I swear I've learned more about beauty and fashion from watching her put crazy things together (and make them work) than I ever could have from watching celebrity designers at work. Elizabeth also has a true understanding of beauty. Often, especially when she was young but even now, she'd point out whatever she thought was beautiful about someone. The remarkable thing is that she didn't see an ugly person and say, "well at least they..." like adults often do. She just didn't see the ugliness (if there was any) at all. She'd just see what was beautiful--Maybe what they were wearing or their lipstick color or their hair color or whatever. The interesting thing is that many of these people would not be considered beautiful by Hollywood standards. But Elizabeth never saw an old woman or a plain woman or some punk teenager with pink hair. She always saw the beautiful parts of the people around us. And she was too young to be faking it in the sincerity department. Would that we could all master that.

So now you know that we're all perfect and live a charmed life. Awesome. Maybe I should tell you that we spend a lot of our days tattling, whining, crying, arguing, burning dinner, not making dinner, grouching at others, ignoring things that obviously ought to be picked up, and sometimes even peeing on the floor right in front of the toilet. But we do try. Yes, we do. And some days we succeed, or at least we're able, just like the young Elizabeth, to see the beautiful parts that stick out.

"Gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder." G.K. Chesterton